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manic depression, it's searching my soul

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a shiny dime for my valentine, eating the liver

of the fire thief, we don't run the heater here

toughen up and learn to live like i do

hurt people hurt people and i am a pain

in the neck leading to the train station

down the alley and it's dark as the sleep could be

then

i forget the little things, the big things

the things that make the day go by like a hurricane

let me paint the town red with reminder ribbons

the memories fade and actions have consequences

i met my mother over a cup of tea and a box of pills

happy father's day, coke and a beer


hurt people hurt people, hurt is hurt and pain is a flash in the pan

and it's all too bright all the time, blinded and unwinded. my fantasy!

My neoheroin born from the messiah's bloody anal cunt, my religion is lost

Long and the heart grows fonder the foundling cries under gaslight

jezuz wore a lampshade in shame, light under a burning bushel

the manhood of the femiminity and the mentality of a dog under the moon

and then there was nothing but a face in the dark and a bucket of pills

and the shakes that hid in the curtains and had fingers like rotted wood

so i slept waking with eyes as wide as the world before me, thinking of the usa

and the ussr and the superheroes born from hiroshima and the happy days in the cold war

i sent a letter to god, post traumatic, dramatic, ecstatic, i am naught but love and fear

fire is a primal thing, real hot bitch, real cold bastard, fuck myself to hell and back

How do I feel? Why don't you tell me, you're the boss mein fuhrer, herr doktor.


the girl remembered her keys that night

she came through the door like a hurricane

when the moonlight when deadlight and black

i waited on the sun and wilted in the dark

and met Jacob in the learning pit

where he offered me diamonds, and i begged for

ladders, rope, toss it down to the hell i found

and i wish we were all found dead

like the dogs and the horses after the war

i felt sick, and the meds turned dystopian

yessir yessir, a goddess came

and she taught me how to be a victim again

and a goddess came and signed some documents

and she had a lot in common with the second coming

the one with blood on their face and beer in their mouth

and i became the butt of the joke, choke on it baby

caught after dark with hand as red as a roulette wheel

spin as i split infinitives with a spider

and watch the girl with confetti in her hair

deepfry herself in the laughter she chokes on.


a shiny dime for my valentine, eating the liver

of the fire thief, we don't run the heater here

toughen up and learn to live like i do

hurt people hurt people and i am a pain

in the neck leading to the train station

down the alley and it's dark as the sleep could be

then

i forget the little things, the big things

the things that make the day go by like a hurricane

let me paint the town red with reminder ribbons

the memories fade and actions have consequences

i met my mother over a cup of tea and a box of pills

happy father's day, coke and a beer


I saw a cat as big as a truckstop, the size of Alice’s mushrooms

With eyes like mixels and layman laziness and full of colourless

Pablo Picasso shakes like a leaf in my womb of my own

Hot and petite, tits up to the north pole, say hi to santa

Nightmares before, during, after, the christmas death day

I came home and came down off the high of life on the line

Hullo Hullo? If no one answers then the phone wasn’t ringing

I’m in love with all the neon and the radio on: alright, says who?

My love is a permissible, missable thing, content of context

They say missed opportunities for the x-y-zeds, zombie movies and popcorn

I’m a worry? Meet the fockers, meet the artistic inspiration


Newborning brain as big as the texan border, I rode the wave like silver quick

Minamata, minimental, the mass of the mental on the toll road to dreamland

Gimme the land of drano and purple koolaid, my eden goes rotten quick

Through the valley of death the train goes click clack paddywhack

I can feel the sleep sneak up on me, how many ways to polish a turd

2 truths and a lie, 2 guards at the bedroom door and 2 hands of God

Left in the gutter with the ghosts and the pretty green, pretty scene

A little cinematography in my autobiography, my darlings won’t die

Let them fall, clip that nevermore raven’s wings and let it fall


You can’t hear the clapped out cars on the way from 9-5 overtime

From the tree where she was found, the penchant for forgetting her keys

And a pendant of copper and a locket with a thimbleful of love and hate

Hair like down, down in the dumps and the drains run over with blood

She ran like Hermes on Heroin, quicksilver mercury mercurial


Cause listen to the violence, the disturbance turbulence

Not noise, just my mind going off in wrong directions

Avant-garde yourself from the pain, neuroblock-shock

The fear you feel should be indistinguishable from love

three walkways away from the source of trauma

We all gotta boogie around


Living a lie made out of various human matters

I pay the rent, I pay the bills, I take my pills

An English accent and 4 cups of tea a day

I follow every rule that the doctor sets and says

my synapses are psychoschizoscum scam kid


There is no asylum from the bedroom to timbuktu

Hell is where the heart is, holidays in the sun

Sun yourself on the beaches of Normandy

Mad here, all are the one, number one in the blues

ABCD and the music burns how pale the brain is

Under whitelight gaslight


I said my vows with crossed fingers

and marbles in my mouth

to hell and back to the bedroom

I forget how to hug and to touch

I eat dinner, I eat lunch, I bleed bidaily

Death is no setback, kickback and fightback

Nothing but calories, are we but human beings?


Dear Abby, dead and lovely baby

meat and 3 veg 3 times a day

this place is a prison

and i get sicker every day

it feels like a school camp smoke

I remember the lies and forget the past

tell you all my secrets and I'llnever be home


We don't ask questions, the sasquatch was born

I was Hyde till I was Jekyll, get it my dear, ammirite

Defence of the dirty ditty, doggone dickhead

horror! The horrors! The horror!

Who cares my little baby, i cried in the bassinet

bass heavy, bottom of the barrel


Ultramarine ultramaine escapism

the king in yellow pages and paint

i felt fear and I needed a hand to hold

The writing's on the wall, crawling

spiders in the pre-dream

you can't say that

lived experience from hell to heaven

heaven to hell, rags to riches

money bought my brain


the moon was looking at the child so sweetly.

a wilted sunflower met my gaze and bled black tears

young and cold, we won't be long for this world

how neoamericanisation can this all get

billboards and adverts and the birth in the back of a taxi

give me enough rope


He never waves as we go by. i split the love in two

i took down the posters and the pain fell like stars

his woman is dying and he never cries just right

it's alive, no pulse but it thinks like you and i

he went out and stood on his patio while the party raged


Banjo Tango a mind of 24/7 music

you make me sick and tired of being sick

watch me disappear and push me into the styx

back on the wagon and i needed a trick to turn

i made miles in a day or two, two days of dirt dragtime

speaking latin in a shirt and jeans

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